Letter to Arvol Looking Horse From White Buffalo Calf Woman

My Holiness  Arvol Looking Horse who Sits on Mountain Tops,

I am so angry with you, I could spank your bottom (slapping a horse will get him to get gallop as the horse represents the soul journey).  Fly like the wind, get going!  You who is to sit on Mountain Tops, and what do you see?  Nothing below is a flowing river, not even the heart.  (I'm in Mountain View, in the Silicon Valley - crystalline, or the stone river).

You were supposed to look for me, white buffalo calf woman, when the white calves were born, but you did not!  You were to go out to all women who claimed to be white buffalo calf woman, but you did not!  You were supposed to open your door to relatives, but you did not!  And when your gatekeeper came to your door (Eagle Thunder, a Violet person, the voice of God), in my name, you shut the door in my face and refused to see me.  And when I was the child, who searched for my relative, you did not, my Elder! 

And my doorkeepers Abby Quiver (Aqua person, Leader of Men) and her Mother Mrs. Quiver (Rainbow person, Rainbow Mother) both stepped away from me, in front of my face (they left the phone and denied that I was even there, literally).  And it is the Quiver that carries the Arrows (flies with the soul) (Abby), and the Salmon (swims in the stream) (Abby's mother) who returns home, both offered their hearts, then little by little just shut me out.  Not long, when I insisted they practice love, they both turned away. Unwilling to help a sun (Charlie Quiver Younger) and unwilling to help a brother (Eagle Thunder), Lakota my heart, why have you not forgiven? 

This is the child (young soul from heaven, the christal child), the one who sought my elders (of the soul, red man) and when I went to the Floyd Looks For Buffalo Hand, an Oglala Lakota (Referred by another who said he was a Medicine Man) who walks with you.  What did he do, but try to kill me spiritually, with two associates, but they ran for their lives as soon as his light was out.  They could not see me in the darkness, but I can see in the dark, numinous flowing.  I had to repay his kindness by taking his light, and then repairing him back to health, which took a very long week.  This is the greeting I received from my relatives, you forgot who you are.  You did not bless your people, like your soul knows!  You listened to your body, and did not walk the Red Road, the law of love.  Now distant relatives call upon me.  This day, I send word to the Blue Lake People, as Twin Deer Mother, because their body remembered to pray.  Their body, remembered their souls.  Their body was blue, my relative.  

Today, I found out that I am Lakota Sioux, my relative.  So many are remembering, but even I denied my own truth.  I do not wish to claim this hate.  I read what I wrote to another Lakota Sioux months ago, and realized the truth, to sea what I did not see.  There I was, practicing my soul, acting out my heart and learning without relatives who could have held my hand.  No one dare go against you, but I will.  No one never speaks against you, but I will. For you wear the crown of earth, the Lavender Person, and I wear the crown of heaven, the Crystal Person.  We are heaven and earth of the Western Shore, where the Spirit of the Lake arises.  Now I will sing to you.

What did you do, inside the blue?  Where did you go, but to the snow?  What made you stop your prayers each day?  For I can see so much hate in thee?  I know it's been a rough road behind, and I know that you are so blind, but this isn't sharing the fire of light, when you pray together with the pipe.  It was your job to bless every day!  It is your job to pray for all relatives each way!  It was your job to receive all the love you have inside, but you did not listen to the soul that you hide.  And I did wonder how you did it for so long?  And I did wonder how come you don't have a song?  And I did wonder who are you all along, if not a Chief who sings a song! 

My heart seems blinded by your hate, because you did not pray this day.  I know what you do, and I'm not so happy, when the people could be building instead of fighting always.  There is so much to do and so little time.  There are so many coming and I don't know how.  How will I be there when so many need.  I need my Elders to come home to me.  How do you think I will do it without you?  How do you think that I don't have a clue.  For I can answer all you have questions for, for I can talk to any ocean floor. There deep in the valleys where the green grass does grow, is where my heart learns to blossom and grow, but where is the stream that I am waiting for, if you don't start praying like you should this day.

Start taking that pipe out and pray like you should.  Start asking for blessings all hours like you could.  Start to bless all the people with each sound that you make, and stop making promises that you can't keep!  And start opening doors without money, for money is not the commodity.  And you know that the only thing that will help the people home, is love inside the heart to allow us to roam.  I say, I will be here when you come to me, but I won't be happy, to see you in the breeze. For I know how much hate that you carry inside of you, for all the Lakota are acting like you.

It's time my Brother to learn who you are.  It's time my Sisters, who will come far, for woman shall return to keep rule again, just as soon, as the crowns begin to roost (four directions).  And I say, there is much for you to learn, because you don't stand by a fire and learn, instead you wonder why they don't come talk with you, and it's because they are supposed to come talk with me.  You are the judgment of the people in their hearts.  You are the one, who should make the people smart (sting) and you are the One who carries the pipe that I sent, and now I must pray that you can start again.

Why do you hate almost everyone, even the Rainbow Whites who come home. It's time of evolution, now you're gonna use a gun (separation, division) and who do you think it will get all back together again.  It will be a white woman, who came to your door.  She is the Lakota that you wanted more, but you could not sea her because you did not see, the heart of a child, who looked up at thee.  Everyday, I cry like a child.  Everyday I wake up I see all your despise and I wonder how can they really learn to walk again, or even try to run over rolling hills once more.  And now the rolling rivers, the stone of tears, has come today to tell me there are no more tears, they shut off the valve where the heart can sing, no more tears, no more joy,  no song of joy!  How can you seem to live this way?  How can you all turn and walk away?  You speak as if you know the wind, but you just turn around and say, another day, another way, but you won't sing it clear.  Now we have much to do, I say hooray.  I sea how love could open all to sing, but we need more pipes who carry the wind, to the heart of the peoples, no matter what shore brings.

All over the world, the people need me, and I often don't know who are what can sing, but I follow the Great Spirits who guide me each day, and all who are loyal to the blue of the heart. I don't know how to end this, which way do I go, I know I love you more than even I could know, it's heaven that is pouring out of every cell, the heart of the people who so want to know more.  But now, I must bid you good night and good rest, because if you don't get some tired rest and start to pray, I worry for you deer (journey), I worry that your life won't last long with strife.  We must get the people to love each day!  We must get the people to smoke the pipe and pray!  We must have caretakers all over the land, when we send the heart of the pure out into the land. Remember they are called Rainbow Warriors.  Remember they will be loyal to you, and now they have someone who will answer their call, as so many are returning to my heart this day. 

But how long will it take for you to step my way?  And what do I say to hold your heart again?  Because I know that I will not be happy when I see your face, because you had forgotten to pray each day.  Sow my beloved, start using the pipe each day, and bless all the relatives each hour of the day, and don't forget to bless your soul, and arrive each day, for an eagle must learn to land, and look around to prey (find your stillness then you know what you are doing, you remember who you are).


Your devoted White Calf has come this day, and I will sing to all who come my way, and I will be devoted to all the suns, no matter who they are or what color they display.  Your Twin Deer Mother, she is the one you need now this day, these are the tools that the Great spirits gave, and I can say, I love you more even as I say, when are you coming home, my love, when are you coming home?

I had to learn to sing alone, and now I must feel like you, because you don't feel the blue, who need blessings from you...my tears flow for you!

August 31, 2009 White Buffalo Calf Woman, Elder Crystal Person, Wakan Iyeshka or Holy Interpreter

PS. Not happy with Floyd Looks For Buffalo Hand, a Proclaimed Medicine Man (His name too, says he is looking for the hand of god, which means he must do good works, I know he thinks he is, but not with separation.  He is the Violet Person, the voice of God and High Priest)  and Russel Means, a Proclaimed Leader of the Lakota whom go against White People, their father nation and relative also, yet offers his land to White People ways, in order he can control what he does not own (He is an Aqua person and Leader of Men).  Mother Earth owns herself and no Man owns any land, and it shall be Woman who claims the Throne for our Men.  We are servants to the World. Now I have so many Proclaimed White Buffalo Calf Woman, just because you did not go looking for me, in amongst the Stone River.  I must tell them who they are, as all is written, every story of eternal is written in your light, both numinous and luminous.  This is the Book I read, that only speaks TRUTH.  The fifth, the blue, commandments say, to Honor your Father and your Mother, your parents.  Great Spirit Mother and Great Spirit Father guides us to be good little children.  Not go against like so many Native Peoples are doing.  WE need our Father on Earth, the White Man, we need our Mother on Earth, the Black/Blue Man, we need our Brother on Earth, the Yellow Man, and we need our Twin Heart, the Red Man. My beloved, I know you did not sign anything with the IRA (Indian Reorganization Act), because I feel it in my heart.  Take your place as Holiness Arvol Looking Horse and all will be fine, when your heart is with mine, for you have lots to learn for all the world, as we bring the four corners home my beloved!  It is time to come home...over the rolling hills of time, whispering to us, come home...
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